Brittany; Nudged In The Right Direction

My sister and I were a product of a dysfunctional family. Our parents had divorced five years ago, my sister living with my Mom, and I was sent off to live with my Dad. One week a year, we got to see the other parent, the stay was often stilted, neither of us knowing what to say or do with the opposite parent. Sis and I would get to see each other for a part of a day, as we exchanged parents, if we were lucky. Now, I was being sent to live with my Mom, Dad is getting remarried, and his new bride is not comfortable with a young man living in the house. In a way, it is probably for the better, the last few months Dad and I have grown farther apart.

With all my worldly possessions packed, I was taken to the bus station for the two day trip out west. Mom, after the divorce went to work for a lady running a dude ranch. They left out the dude part now, Circle C Guest Ranch was the name they operated under. It was a ranch where young women, could spend a few weeks away from all the city life, high school drama and their parents.

The lady died a year ago leaving the ranch to my Mom. Mom had been responsible for much of the growth in the last couple of years, for which the owner was very thankful. It had become progressively more successful over the years, attracting a wide cross section of young females to the ranch. Sis was involved too, although she never told me exactly what her duties were.

The trip was boring, I spent almost the whole time listening to my IPod and reading my books on it. Every once in a while, I would look up at the passing scenery, but most of the time, I was immersed in my reading. Even in school, that is what I mainly did, I was definitely a loner, had no friends, and really wasn’t interested in making any new ones. I was still angry at Dad for casting me off, his true feelings for me coming out in the lack of dialogue before I was sent away. Dad had dropped me and my luggage off at the station, and then went back home, no goodbye, no good luck, nothing. It was apparent there was not much love there ever.

I really didn’t know Mom, the memories of us together were old and faded, and I am sure not what it will be like now. A week’s exposure once a year, is so different than living with someone all the time. We got along alright on my week’s stay, that might be the key word here, never a relationship, just getting along until it was time for me to go back. We knew little of each other, maybe even less after a week’s stay. I never participated much on my one week stay, ended up reading like I usually do with a computer game or two to liven things up. I ate the meals, they were much better than I received at home, but that was it, back to my room and my isolation.

After a week, back on the bus and to my life with Dad. Since sis was not there I am not sure Mom knew what to do with me to get me to participate in life. The one or two times Sis and I had a chance to talk while changing buses she agreed with me Dad was a bore and not really interested in either of us. I am sure she overheard some comments about me, but never revealed what they were. She yelled at me for not opening up to Mom, surely you can see she cares a lot more than Dad ever did. She just doesn’t know how to get you to respond. So the summer trips kept happening, nothing changed until Dad had no more use for me and I was shipped off to Mother.

I was nineteen, old enough to be on my own, but no way for me to sustain that life. A year out of high school, some experience flipping burgers, but that was the total of my life experiences. I had lived at home till now, doing my chores around the house and my part time job. Not much of a life, but that’s all I had and desired.

When the bus pulled into the terminal in Payson Arizona, an old former gas station, I let out a big sigh. I was glad to see Mom and Sis standing there waiting for me. At least, they cared enough to show up. As I departed the bus, I was hugged by both, the feeling of being held and loved made me feel so good. I missed that feeling, now realizing that Dad never did love me, just someone he had to put up with. We waited for my luggage to be unloaded, and then together we got it to Mom’s pickup. The luggage was slipped into the pickup bed, and I made my way to the back seat of the four door pickup. Mom and sis in the front seat. The ride out to the ranch took over an hour, we climbed the Mogollon Rim until we reached the top, then traveled along the rim towards Heber. I was transfixed by the view. I had been here before, but the beauty and majesty of it had somehow escaped my mind in previous trips. Somehow this trip seemed to be different, not a week’s stay but now to be living here full time, possibly a home.

We pulled into the ranch. A long drive from an arched entrance at the highway, led to the ranch house itself. When we got to the ranch proper, I was surprised at what it now looked like. Lots of new buildings and a huge barn had been erected. We pulled up to the main house and I was taken inside. Since it was late in the afternoon, dinner had been cooked and was on the table. I started drooling right away, it looked so good. There was roast beef, corn on the cob, green beans, biscuits, gravy and a still steaming apple pie at the end of the table. I was shown where I should sit, grace was said, and then I dug in. Mom kept looking my way quite often and shaking her head.

“Your dad never fed you Brett?” I mumbled an answer, but her look told me that would never do. I swallowed what was in my mouth and answered appropriately.

“Yes, he fed me, but never anything this good.” I then filled my mouth again with the offerings on the table. I did finally reach my capacity, and had to stop shoveling it in. I looked at the table, wondering what is going to happen to all of this good food. Sis however took my hand and led me outside. She felt a diversion was needed. We walked out to the barn and as she slid the one door back, two rows of stalls appeared, most of which had a horse peering at us from it. We walked along the aisle with Sis rubbing each of their heads as we passed.

She stopped at one of them, and had me rub the horse’s head. He whinnied and I jumped back. Sis broke out in giggles, but the horse leaned closer and rubbed his head on my neck and shoulders. Sis stared wide eyed at the horse, then opened the lower door to his stall, and he ventured out, and got behind me and nudged me. I turned to look at him, his head coming close again, and I reached up and rubbed him right between the eyes. Sis handed me a sugar cube and when he leaned in again, I opened my hand, and he took it right from my hand. He was so gentle, I just felt a little wet and the cube was gone.

Sis and I walked further down the aisle between the stalls, my new friend following me, right behind us. I petted several of the horses, their curiosity to see who the new person was getting the best of them. Last time I was here, they didn’t have the horses, so this was all new to me. When we got to the end, we walked back my new buddy following right along. Sis stopped at his stall handing me another sugar cube and suggested that I put him back into his stall. I rubbed his head and then walked into the stall, he followed me and I turned around, held out my hand and he took it into his mouth. I didn’t even feel his wet tongue this time. She closed the lower door so he was safely in his stall.

We walked back to the house, my Sis shaking her head. As we entered the living room, Mom came and hugged me, it felt so good, asking if I enjoyed the horses. Before I could say anything, Sis was already talking. “Mom you will not believe it, he fed Black Shadow from his hand, twice, then walked him back into his stall like it was just an everyday occurrence. Black Shadow followed him all through the barn nudging him and whinnying. I have never seen that horse act like that, if I had a camera, I would have taken hundreds of pictures. I bet he can ride Black Shadow with no problem, it was like the horse was under a spell.”

Mom smiled, maybe we found a job for Brett here at the ranch. Sis spoke up quickly. “Oh that sounds wonderful, I like the horses, but he would be much better at it than me. I still can’t believe that horse fawning over him.”

Mom did elaborate at how they came by the horses. “An animal shelter in Phoenix rescued some horses that were being mistreated. They were kept on a farm until they had been fed properly and had a chance to recover. They were having to pay to keep them on the farm, so they made some calls to see if they could find them a home. One of the people they called told them about us, so the next call was to us. Our property was fenced, so that was not a problem. Some kind of shelter would have to be provided, then the idea of offering trail rides came up. Your sister was sent to another ranch for a few days to learn the care and feeding of horses.

“In the meantime, I had several contractors out to see about building a barn. It turns out there was one on another ranch they wanted removed. I made some calls and in ten days, we had the barn you see now. I made arrangements to have the horses transported here. Before they arrived, we got calls from two more shelters with horses that need homes. The next week was pretty busy as four livestock transporters came and dropped off their load. As you can see, we have nineteen horses, the last was Black Shadow. He was very spooky, would not let anyone get close to him. But it seems somehow he has fallen in love with you.”

Tomorrow, we will see dear, about teaming Brett with the horses. Show you brother to his room, I am sure he is tired from his trip, change into your bed clothes, and we will have some hot chocolate and apple pie. My face lit up, I do remember the hot chocolate from before, so good, definitely something to look forward to. We went down the hall to the last bedroom on the right, as I entered, I was shocked at the décor. It looked exactly like a girl’s room. Before I could say much, Sis told me that Mom will redecorate as soon as I know what I want. The lady that owned the ranch previously, used it for her daughter and they had not done anything to it since. In my previous trips Mom and Sis had rented a small house closer to town and that is where I stayed during my week long visit.

She showed me the bathroom and suggested a shower before we drink our hot chocolate. I grabbed my pajamas and went to take a shower. There was a tub to the side of the shower, large and inviting. I thought about it instead, but the awaiting hot chocolate was the better option. I made quick work of it, dressed in my pajamas and went out to the bedroom. There to my horror, Sis was hanging up my clothes. I looked around quickly, my trunk with my personal things seemed to be left undisturbed, I sighed in relief, I sure didn’t want to explain the contents of my trunk to her or Mom.

We left, heading to the kitchen, the ranch’s cooking help just finishing cleaning up. I found out that Betty and Sally were the cooks and lived in one of the bungalows behind the house. They cooked the meals and served them in the dining room in shifts, the older kids first then the younger kids. The dining room table would seat forty people at a time, but sometimes the ranch attendance was more than forty.

Each bungalow housed ten youths at a time, a separate counselor for each bungalow. There were ten bungalows in total, although they seldom used them all. Two were for employees, the cooks in one and the housekeepers in the other. The counselors had a separate room in each bungalow for themselves. Everybody ate at the house with their group of youths. Mom, Sis and I could eat with any group anytime we felt like it.

The hot chocolate was to die for, I drank two full mugs full of the heavenly tasting delight. Of course, the apple pie had to be tasted, it was now cool enough to be enjoyed. We talked for a while, my yawning eventually sent me to bed, slipping under the covers of the canopy bed felt so good. As I slid under the satin sheets they were icing on the cake. I almost purred as the sensations attacked my body, the goose pimples raising all over my body. I was in heaven, now how do I keep this fantasy from disappearing?

I woke early, after dressing, I made sure my trunk was at the back of my closet and covered with as much stuff piled on it as I could find. Hopefully, that will keep inquisitive eyes away from it. I went to the kitchen and drooled over some sausage biscuits piled on a plate. Betty came over, ruffled my hair and told me to be quick about it. I grabbed three of them in a napkin and kissed her on the cheek and made my escape. I could hear laughing as I left. I wandered out to the barn, surprised to find Sis already up and working with the horses.

I woofed down my breakfast and joined in helping her. She showed what to do and I started on the next stall, each horse welcomed me, and I quickly cleaned their stall giving then fresh water and a grain mixture. Sis had given me some sugar cubes, as I finished, I gave each a cube. I was down to Black Shadow’s stall so I opened the lower door and walked in. I got a nudge, then his head right next to my neck and shoulders. I patted his head and rubbed between his eyes, with him just standing there, enjoying what I was doing.

I cleaned his stall, gave him water and food then held out my hand with the sugar cube. He came up behind me and butted me sending me sprawling to the floor, landing on my butt. He stepped up closer and stood over me, putting his head right on my chest. I reached up to rub him some more, laughter coming from the stall door. Both Mom and Sis were standing there laughing at my expense.

“Well it looks like you and Black Shadow have come to an agreement. He will let you up as soon as he gets enough rubbing from you and not before.” I held out the sugar cube in my hand but he ignored it, wanting the rubbing instead, the laughter once again filling the barn. Five minutes later, he took the sugar cube and let me up, I hugged him around the neck and he whinnied for me. I guess its official we are an item now.

Sis had almost finished the stalls while I had been kidnapped. Next, she showed me how to saddle a horse. I did pretty well but I didn’t get the cinch tight enough, so when I tried to mount the horse, the saddle slipped around landing me on the ground. Another chance to get her jollies for the day. I was made to saddle each horse, and ride them to the end of the entrance road, then back. Two of those trips constituted their exercise for the day. The first few trips were definitely Kodak moments, as I jostled around in the saddle. The horses were used to new riders, so it was not a problem for them. Several times, I just about tumbled from the saddle when losing my footing in the stirrup. Sis had a ball watching me, I am sure she hadn’t had this much fun in years.

When I was done, I was seriously pooped, lunch had come and gone, with me not getting any. I just wanted to get done for the day. As I walked into the main house that night, Mom saw me and gave me a huge hug. Go take a relaxing bath, and I will bring your dinner to you. It sounded like a great idea if I could just make it to my room. Sis was following me, having a ball at how I was walking. In the saddle all day, I was extremely bow legged. I doubted I could get my knees to touch, or even come close, no matter how hard I tried.

I slipped into the tub using the scents and bath salts near the tub. They smelled so good, then I thought of how my body will smell when I got out of the tub. An oops moment for sure. I heard Mom come in and leave my dinner, telling me to finish up and come eat. I presumed she left, so I got out, patted myself dry and wrapped the towel around my body. I made my way to the vanity in the bedroom where she had set my meal, pulling the chair out to sit. As my butt hit the chair seat, Sis from behind me said ‘you smell so good’. I was so startled, I almost fell off the chair. Sis giggled but walked out of the room. Nothing was said as she exited the room, but I am sure she had plenty on her mind.

The dinner hit the spot, but the day was catching up to me fast. I yawned, trying to keep going, but by the third yawn, I surrendered and slipped into bed. I did set the alarm, I wanted to help with the horses again, the most fun thing I have done in years. As soon as the alarm sounded, I was out of bed and dressed in under five minutes. I took care of my bathroom needs and headed for the kitchen. Today, it was bacon biscuits, I gave my pouty look and was rewarded with giggling and a brown paper bag with my loot in it. I gave her another kiss, she holding the spot I kissed with her hand to preserve it for all time.

I made my way to the barn, the door was open already but I didn’t see Sis. I started on the first stall, doing what I was taught, working my way down the aisle. Two hours later I had finished all but Black Shadow. He had been watching me from his stall, not happy that I had saved him for last. I entered his stall, he circled me, and butted me to the floor. I was laughing at his antics, as he again stood over me with his head just inches from my chest. I tried to get up several times, but he kept his head there so that I couldn’t get up. I tried the sugar cube, in fact, I offered him several since Sis had showed me yesterday where she kept them. No luck, he wanted attention and that was it.

Sis came in later, took one look in the stall, and broke out in laughter. I think he is trying to tell you something, but you just don’t seem to get it. It was at least fifteen minutes later when he let me up. I tried to give him the sugar cube, and he ignored my hand, and went for the pocket where I had the rest. That tongue of his found them all and made quick work of them, then, he nudged me again out into the aisle. He kept pushing me towards the tack room, Sis having a laughing fit at my expense.

“I think he wants to go out with his new love, so saddle him up, and we will ride the trail so you know where it is and where it goes.” Sis had already saddled her horse while Black Shadow had me down for the count. I got him ready and we set off, the trail led from the barn over a few foothills, and then followed a stream up the side of the rim, to a higher ridge off in the distance. At this point, the rim was not as tall as it was further down, but still way up there. Sis said the elevation was close to 6000 feet at this point. The ride took about an hour, the scenery was truly majestic, the views as the trail switch backed up the ridge were all picture perfect. With Sis watching closely to see how Black Shadow and I interacted, definitely expecting me to get dumped at some point. We were part way up the trail when she relaxed, it seems that the horse had found his soul mate and I was the designated one.

Sis showed me how the trail was marked, metal poles sunk into the ground, each stake within the sight of another. Even at night, the solar light in the top of the pole, would come on to show the way. The poles were not that tall, not hardly visible to the eye, it wasn’t their intention to ruin the pristine landscape and view, but to provide any riders of the trail a clear idea of where it led.

When we got to the top, we tied the horses up to a tree branch and walked a few feet up onto to a rock outcropping. The view from the top was beautiful. I bet you could see for miles to the south, that she had me turn around, and far to the north was the San Francisco Peaks and all of their majesty. The peaks still had a little snow around the top of each peak. It was so perfect up here. We set there on a couple of large rocks to view the splendor of nature. It was almost as if the rocks were put there just for us to view the spectacle. I could see a storm way off to the south, just gathering its strength for the evening hours, the thunderheads swelling as the heat from the desert mixed with the cool air from the mountains.

As we got up to leave, Sis leaned close to me and whispered you smell so good, that scent is definitely you. Of course, I blushed every shade of red possible, but nothing more was said as we made our way back down the ridge. When we got back, Sis made her way to the house to help Mom, and I took care of both of the horses. I spent extra time with Black Shadow, if I hadn’t, I don’t think I would have been allowed to return to the house.

I made it back to the house a little later, everybody busy getting things set up in the dining room. Apparently, the next set of guests were arriving tonight for a five day stay. The dining room table was totally set up and five other ladies were in attendance. Mom took a few minutes to introduce me to the counselors. They lived in the area and stayed at the ranch when we had guests. They were all Registered Nurses, two with a degree in Psychology. One in particular was interested in my story, wanting to hear all about me and my relationship with my dad. Her name was Elizabeth, very disarming in her behavior. Before I knew it, I was divulging all to her like I had known her all my life.

We all went outside as the first bus pulled up, and twenty-seven young females got off. Another bus right behind it had twenty-three more females on it. The first bus was from Phoenix, the second was from Flagstaff. Each counselor called out the names on her list so there ended being five groups of girls, a counselor with each. Two of the counselors led their girls to their bungalows to get settled in while the other three led their charges into the house for dinner. Sis and I helped with the girl’s luggage piling it on a large ATV for the trek to the bungalows. Mom had told us which luggage went where and soon we had it all sorted and on the front porch of their respective bungalow. Mom approached me asking me if I wanted the job with the horses. My enthusiastic hug gave her the answer she was looking for. A trail ride every day with a bungalows guests. Sis would accompany me on each ride to observe and help if I need the help. Otherwise, she is just another guest on the ride.

If I handled it right, it would become my permanent job if I wanted it. I was literally jumping up and down with that statement. I did calm down some and we ate with the last group of girls. I was so isolated at high school, I was floored at the fun the girls were having. They were talking with each other, with girls on the other side of the table and eating a little as they did so. I just watched, this was so new to me and I was becoming jealous. I looked at Mom several times to see if she was watching me, but the only eyes that were on me were Sis and Elizabeth. I quickly focused on what I was eating not looking up from my plate again that evening.

Sis took me aside after the dinner, telling me what I had to do in the morning to get ready for the trail ride. “Pull out twelve horses, saddle them and then when the girls come out, go over it with each girl. Most of these girls have ridden before, so it should be only a refresher. Explain the rules of the ride and help them mount up, most of the girls are too short to easily mount up themselves. Then, head out, you in the lead, watching for animals on the trail and, of course, snakes. Carry a pellet gun on you horse, so that you can encourage any critter off the trail. It doesn’t make much noise, so it is unlikely to spook the horses. I will follow behind, to keep an eye on the girls and horses. Up to where I took you and back, it should be a little over a two hour ride. The girls are never to get off their horses unless there is an emergency. Too many chances of something happening.

“Inside the barn is a list of the horses and their gentleness. Pick from the first fifteen horses except for Black Shadow. I prefer Canyon Girl for my horse, so if you would, please honor my wish. When we get back, unsaddle the horses and have the girls wipe them down and brush them, at least the part they can reach. Any questions?”

I thought I understood her directions, so I told her no questions. I went to the barn and selected twelve saddles, made sure they were clean and laid the appropriate bit and reins with them. I selected twelve blankets and had them ready on a table by the tack room. I figured I was now ready for tomorrow, at least to the best of my ability. I wondered back to the house, the girls screaming and playing as they made their way to their bungalows for the night. I just stood there watching their antics, a tear sliding from the corner of my eye.

After they had all left, I went on to my room. As I entered the first thing I saw was my trunk on the end of my bed. I went to it and opened the unlocked lid, it was now empty. I ran to the closet to see everything hanging neatly in my closet. I slid down the door frame my feet underneath me, curled to the side. I held my head in my hands and started to sob, now everything will come out, what am I going to do? I am not sure how long I sat like that, sobbing. My mind was not functioning anymore, I couldn’t even think what to do or say to explain the clothes, to whoever unpacked them and hung them up.

Sometime later, I felt some hands on my shoulders as I was helped up and led to my bed. Right there on the pillow was my nightie from the trunk, I broke down again, but Mom held me comforting me. “I was sure you would be cried out by now, we will have to watch your water intake.” She pulled me closer, helping me to get out of my clothes, then slipped the nightie over my shoulders. As it slid down my body, I shivered a little. She pulled back my covers and helped me slide in. I was kissed on the forehead, turning out the light as she left the room.

It all caught up with me in a hurry, and I was asleep in minutes. It was a restless sleep, I tossed and turned all night long. The alarm woke me, I remembered the trail ride and got ready as fast as I could. I passed through the kitchen, bribed Betty again, and was eating my loot as I made my way to the barn.

I led each selected horse out of the stall, slid the blanket on and then the saddle. The bit was put in their mouth as the bridle was slipped over their head. I checked the tightness, and then led them further done the aisle to wait until I had the others done. I tied the reins to hooks on the wall to keep them from wandering off, then went back to get the next horse. Within forty minutes, I had all the horses ready except Black Shadow. When I went to his stall, he was pouting in the corner, I went up to him and grabbed his neck in a hug, he turned around with me still holding on. I let go to get him out of the stall, but he had other ideas. Soon, I was on the floor his head in my chest as he was licking me on the face. I presume it was his tongue, I know it was very rough and very wet.

Of course, that is where Sis found me, as she came around the corner of the stall she busted into laughter. “I can see you have the situation well in hand, so I will just get my horse and leave you two lovebirds alone. It was ten minutes before he would let me up, then, he beat me to the tack room, waiting for his saddle and bridle. I got him ready just in time as the ten squealing young females entered the barn.

I took each one and showed them their horse, helped them up into the saddle, and went over the rules of the trail ride. I made them tell me they understood, then let them leave the barn, seeing if they could indeed handle the horse. With the last one completed, I mounted Black Shadow and we headed out, I kept the pace slow while we crossed the field, riding to the side to see who might be having trouble with their horse. Everybody was doing well, so I went back to the front and led the way out onto the trail for the climb up to the ridge.

The trip was pleasant, I could hear the girls talking excitedly as we made our way. Definitely no lack of chatter on the trip. In the wider areas of the trail one the girls rode alongside me, asking how long I had been here. She was a guest last year and didn’t remember me. She made compliments about Black Shadow, no one was able to ride him last year, way too spirited and jumpy for anyone to try. Even Barb would not attempt it. Barbara is my sister, although I am sure that Ginger, the young guest did not know that.

Then, her next statement really surprised me. “If you would wear a little makeup and let your hair down out of that ponytail, you would look so pretty, a much better look for you than this tomboy look. I blushed red all over, yes even down there. I hadn’t the slightest idea what to say to her, eventually telling her that I would try it, thanking her for the compliment.

We got up to the viewpoint, then turned around and headed back down. This time several of the other girls joined my talkative guest, talking about anything and everything. They agreed that my hair in a ponytail was not flattering enough for me, and that a touch of makeup would add just the right touch to a beautiful face. I am sure Sis heard part of this, the giggling coming from the rear of the group, a sure indication of that.

I felt something different when we returned to the barn, I was included with the girls, a member of their group, not something I have ever experienced before. I helped the girls down from the horses, getting hugs from everyone. I slipped off the saddles and they started brushing and wiping their horses down. They had fun doing it, then, when they had reached all they could, they came over and started on Black Shadow, I watched the horse as ten girls started on him, his head rising as far as it could get, he was so eating this up. I went to the other horses, finishing what the girls couldn’t reach, and led them into their stalls and took off the bridles. I had a bunch of contented horses as a result of all of the attention.

The girls stayed with me until all the horses were back in their stalls, then mobbed me in a group hug, telling me how much they enjoyed the day. I was almost in tears when they left to go back to the bungalow. Even with all the attention, Black Shadow wanted my personal attention before he went into his stall, His head next to mine rubbing his neck against mine, I presumed thanking me for the ride, and all the attention from the girls. That is where Barb found me.

Barb came over and hugged me, “Maybe you will realize what you are deep down and quit putting on this phony act. Now come on it is time for lunch.” We walked back to the house, then I remembered the trunk. I am sure Mom was the one to hang the clothes, and I am positive, I will hear about it soon.

Betty and Sally had prepared a true picnic type spread. Baked beans, potato salad, cucumber and onion salad and tons of grilled hot dogs. Today, it was set-up as a buffet, the weather was perfect and at the back of the house, was a large shaded area with a bunch of picnic tables. All of this made for a welcome setting for a picnic. The girls had all went to change or clean-up a little, so myself and the adults, were alone with all that food.

I had filled my plate and then headed out to find a place to sit. The adults were grouped together up by the house. I decided that anywhere away from Mom might be a wise choice for a while. I found a seat, and made myself comfortable. Within minutes, the girls from the morning trail ride were seated by me and were chatting away.

I listened, but did not have anything to add since the topics were boys, hair, clothes and makeup. Several of the girls had brought their purses and after eating, were applying some lipstick or brushing their hair. Lorrie from this morning, came behind me and started brushing my hair after taking out my ponytail. It felt so good, as she ran the brush from my scalp to the end of the hair. She mentioned that I need a haircut, way too many split ends. Then, her friend Sophia came over with a lipstick, she raised my head so that I was looking at her and wet my lips with the lipstick. I rubbed my lips together as I have seen Mom and Barbara do many times. I thanked them for the lipstick and brushing, blushing all the way to my toes. A grown male letting some young girls fix me up like a female. When I looked around to see who had witnessed this event, both Mom and Barb had the biggest smiles on their faces.

The girl’s counselor had come to gather them up, they were going to do some exercising in their cabin to pop music. It sounded like fun for them, they were jumping up and down all excited about the activity and were running back to the bungalow. Mom was making her way to me from across the way. She stood in front of me took my hand and led me inside. I was almost to the point of throwing up, my stomach doing flip flops at what is surely to be coming. Down to my room, then, she closed the door behind us.

“You look very nice with your hair brushed and the lipstick. It really suits you. Now you and I need to do some talking. I have several questions and I want honest answers, not the crap you usually give me. You are not in trouble, in fact it is totally the opposite. I know what is in your heart, who do you think sent you an allowance every month. Jenny in the thrift store where you bought all of you things, thinks the same as I do. Now are you truly happy? If not, you need to do some soul searching and change your life.”

I only told her a half truth, I am happy, happier than I have been in my life. I cringed and for the first time since we entered my room, looked up at her. She had the biggest smile on her face and a few tears sliding down her cheek. I didn’t have the smile, but my tears were just waiting to cascade out of mine. I reached up to hug her, it just felt right to do so. As I leaned into her and held her tight, her arms coming around and pulled me as close to her as possible. That was the cue for my dam to break, and my tears came out hot and heavy. We just held each other for some time, tears dripping on each other’s shoulders. It felt so good to be hugged and loved, I could feel her love for me, the more I cried, the tighter she held me.

She told me that I was to make myself available later tonight right after dinner. Someone was coming to help the girls with their looks and I need to be there. Now go wash up and maybe take a nap, or spend some time with your lover in the barn. I had some time before dinner, so I decided on my lover. Since the clothes were out of the trunk, I thought I might dress up a little, mainly underwear and then cover it up and ride out to the lookout point. I let Sis know where I was going, a firm rule of Mothers.

I picked some of my favorite pieces, even a pair of women’s low heel sandals to wear. I slipped on a baggy shirt, a pair of jeans and I was off. If Mom decided to talk about the contents of trunk this afternoon, at least I wouldn’t be available. I saddled up Black Shadow and headed out. The horse seemed in a hurry this afternoon, not the slow pace we used for the trail ride. When we got to the lookout point, I tied his reins to a branch. I removed my shirt and pants and put them on the back of the saddle and tied them there.

I wanted the feel of nature while I was dressed, indulging in something I loved, while looking at the beauty of nature. I sat on the rock for quite some time, watching the clouds roll by and the afternoon thunderstorms build up down below in the valley. If anybody could see me, a male in lingerie, looking at the pristine view, I am sure there would be some giggles. Unfortunately, all wonderful things have to come to an end, so I got up and made my back to the horse. I looked all around Black Shadow was gone. I saw the torn off branch on the ground, but the damn horse had run off. Here I am an hour from the ranch by foot, in female underwear and women’s shoes. Not the best for walking back home in on this terrain.

I did what I have done a lot of recently and broke down in tears. “That stupid horse, wait till I get my hands on him!” That statement was yelled to no one in particular, since there was no one to listen to me anyway. It also didn’t make me feel any better. The crying lasted for about twenty minutes, about the limit of the available moisture for that purpose. Nothing left to do, I made the first steps toward the ranch. It was hard walking over the rough ground, a task the shoes were not designed for. My feet did look cute in them if that is any consolation.

I would get about twenty feet, then cuss the horse again. At his rate, by the time I got back to the ranch, I would not have any voice left. I had made it about a mile down the trail, when I heard a motor off in the distance. Maybe someone is coming looking for me. Around the next bend, I saw Sis in the large ATV. As soon as she sees me she starts laughing. I guess I make a comical site in my undies staggering along the trail.

She pulls alongside, then passes me to turn around. She stops next to me, asking if I would like a ride. I whisper out a response, my voice not capable of much more. “Are you okay? We were puzzled at first when we saw Black Shadow and no rider. Then, I saw you pants and shirt tied to the back of the saddle and I figured out what you might be doing. Mom and I had a little talk as I was fueling up the ATV. I was going to go out and find you and Mom was going to your bedroom to throw out all your male clothes. We both have tried to get you to face up to the problem, but you insist on doing it the hard way.”

“Get off the ATV and slip on you dress, unless you want to appear in front all of all the girls and Mom in your frilly underwear. Incidentally, I like that bra and panty set, but the garter belt and stockings are a bit much for an afternoon ride though. Your horse led the way up here, showing me where you were. I think he too was fed up with you putting off the inevitable. He is around the bend waiting to be sure you are alright.”

I looked at the dress she had picked out for me, the frilliest sun dress I had, all in pink and white, with little green and burgundy flowers sprinkled all over the dress. I let out a low groan and slipped it over my head. I turned my back to Sis and she zipped me up. I was quiet as we headed back, how do I face Mom like this? The ATV made good time and soon the ranch was in sight. There was quite a crowd to welcome the wayward stranger. Barb parked a little ways from Mom, and the girls all ran to me and hugged me complimenting me on the dress. They all wanted to know what happened. Barbara appeased them telling them I would explain after dinner. Their counselors hustled them all inside since dinner was already on the table.

I was standing next to the ATV with my eyes locked on my feet. Barb was still on the machine waiting for me to do something. Something pushed me from behind, I had to step forward to keep from falling. I turned around and Black Shadow was getting ready to do it again. I made another step towards Mom and he was right behind me. I paused one more time, and he pushed me hard with his head sending me right into her arms. Damn stupid horse.

I was tenderly held, I tried to withdraw several times, but she would have none of that. She eventually pushed me back to take a better look at me, ruffled up my hair and told me to take care of Black Shadow. I headed to the barn, still a little miffed at him. He walked right next to me, reaching his head over to nudge me every once in a while. By the time I got to the barn, I had forgave him, but I did threaten him, if he ever did it again. I removed his saddle, blanket and bridle putting them all up in the tack room.

I brushed him down, taking a little extra time to show him I cared for him. As I closed his stall door he had his head over the bottom part of it right next to my shoulder. I got a kiss at least that is what I thought it was, being that it was wet and either his tongue or mouth was involved. A kiss from a horse is something to experience, the wetness, the coarseness, the hardest to tolerate. Since we were lovers, I had to make allowances. I hugged him and made my way inside, time to see what my fate was going to be.

Dinner was being set on the table, I had lost my appetite today, too much going in and most of it unresolved. I guess Mom is alright with me as a female, the hugs I received in the yard indicative of some acceptance. The fact that I had hid it from her more than likely to cause some punishment. I excused myself to get ready for bed, my Mom giving me a look, but allowed me to proceed. I was fairly positive I would receive several visitors shortly, as soon as dinner was finished. I couldn’t stand to be around the other girls tonight, there frivolity and laughing making me realize how alone I was.

I laid in bed thinking of all the day’s activities. Black Shadow doing me a favor in a way. Now it is all out, just not how it was supposed to be handled. The only thing I was relatively sure of, was I was not going to be sent back to my Dad, but beyond that nothing was a given. I dozed off a time or two, both times waking suddenly from a bad dream. The last time I was startled awake from a part of the bad dream, Mom was there holding my hand. I was shaking, the dream had me back with my Father, his new wife, exposing me in public to get me to leave. The laughing from others resonating in my head.

Waking up, I was gratified that most of dreams had ceased sometime during the night. The last few hours of sleep had been dream free. I made my usual robbery from the kitchen, Betty giggling and holding her cheek where I had kissed it. She makes such good biscuits. Today I was attired in my only pair of female jeans and a large feminine blouse. The blouse was one that I had bought before I knew my sizes, it looked alright just was two sizes larger than I needed. My sneakers completed the outfit.

The horses all greeted me as I slid the door to the barn open. The whinnying was quite loud, they must want extra attention today again. I saddled up enough horses for the trail ride, then Black Shadow. I had to spend some extra time with him, he does not like to be the last one to be saddled and made ready.

Again, ten squealing females entered the barn, this time gathering around me instead of the horses. They were telling me of the fun they had last night, a lady from a salon showing them about makeup and hair styles. They wanted me there with them, but was told I was sick. The lady is coming back tonight, they will make sure I am there. I checked them out on their horse, then we headed up the trail at a leisurely pace. I had a few memorable moments as I remembered being stranded out here in my underwear, but was able to giggle a little at the thought of how I was dressed. I reached down to rub Black Shadows neck, another effort to apologize for all the names I called him yesterday.

The ride was uneventful, the girls having way too much fun, when we got back and they started brushing their horses down. I know the horses were not complaining, as they got all the attention. Lunch was another picnic, this time I was surrounded by all the girls, even the ones that I had not yet got out on the trail with. After the place was cleaned up, I was shanghaied and hustled off to one of the bungalows. For the next few hours the girls showed me everything they learned last night, mainly on my face and hair. When I managed to escape, and entered the main house, Barbara got a look at me and hugged me tightly. She could see I was happy, the girls were including me in everything they did, just as if I was one of them. Mom joined her shortly thereafter, thrilled at my looks and the smile radiating off my face.

I managed to make it to my bedroom, the first time I had to really see what clothes I had left. I looked through each item, trying to remember what I had when I arrived. Quickly it became apparent that anything that remotely looked boyish, had been done away with. I chose an outfit for dinner tonight, then made my way to the bathroom, a sweet smelling bath calling my name. I dozed off a couple of times, the warm fragrant water too much for me.

Back to my bedroom and into my clothing for tonight. The panty and bra set was my frilliest, I felt girly tonight. Another sundress, this one more conservative, with a pair of low heels completing my outfit. I had spared my face while bathing, the girls had so much fun doing my makeup, I didn’t want them thinking I didn’t like it. I checked myself in the mirror, then headed downstairs. I helped serve the first group of diners, the conversation quite lively among the girls. I was included often, their thoughtfulness making me swell with pride. After the first group finished, I helped clean up, the cooks and housekeepers thanking me for helping out.

Betty had outdone herself, the roast, potatoes, and carrots were so good, I was torn whether to eat my fill or pay attention to my female figure. My figure won, only one helping of that delicious food, but it was so hard to push my plate away. Then, she had the nerve to put a cherry pie on the table fresh from the oven, actually three pies since the first round of diners had missed the pie. Suddenly the dining room was full, lots of eager young females forgetting their figures, the pies smelling so good.

Everybody was gathering in the lounge area, most of the girls finding a spot on the floor, leaving the chairs for the counselors and adults. Half an hour later a lady arrived to cheers from the girls. I and one of the counselors helped get her cases inside, as she started setting things up. Several times I noticed her staring at me, maybe someone else that has figured out my secret. She ran over a few basics with the girls, kind of a refresher from last night. Then she asked for a volunteer. I noticed a lot of the girls getting up off the floor, so I figured I was safe. Instead, the girls all headed my way, surrounded me and pulled me from the floor. I was led, pushed and otherwise herded to the ladies chair. I tried my best to pull back, but with six girls around me, I had very little chance of success.

The lady took my hand introducing herself as Stevie, pulled me in for a hug, whispering to me to relax, this will be fun and you will look so good afterwards. “Brittany has volunteered to help me tonight, just as you girls told me last night, she has lots of potential. We are doing evening makeup tonight, I am going to do one side of her face and she is going to do the other side. We will have that tomboy look out of her before the night is over.”

True to her word, I was shown what to do and then had to duplicate it on the other side of my face. I took my time, this was kind of fun, so I was trying to prolong the experience. When we had went through all the makeup, she showed me how to remove it properly and had me do my whole face again. I especially like the lipstick, deciding that I would always wear lipstick no matter where I went. I got applause from the girls when I finished, and was mobbed as all of them wanted a hug. Later, as I was helping Stevie to get her cases back to her car, she pulled me aside. You have an all-day appointment at our salon tomorrow, the few remaining masculine items that you have will be eliminated. You are definitely a female, how you act, behave, and care, a 100% female. After you leave the salon there will be no doubt. One of our courtesy vehicles will pick you up at seven A.M. so be ready. It will return you here later in the evening after your transformation. Now give me a hug and dream female tonight.

I did dream about being female, but by morning, the true reality had intruded, to bring me back to earth with a thud. I slipped one of my sweat suits and made my way downstairs. I was early, but wanted to say hi to Black Shadow before I left. I made my usual stop at the kitchen, Betty already having my goodies ready for me. I headed out to the barn and as I entered, I heard Black Shadow whinnying at me. I made my way down the row of stalls, each of the horses greeting me. I got down to my lover and peaked around the stall door there he was waiting for me. I walked up to the door and opened it, he came up next to me and laid his head on my shoulder.

“Well you started this when you outed me to the whole world, so you will have to put up with me not being here today.” I heard a horn beep in the drive. I presume my ride is here. Black Shadow started pushing me to the door, the more I resisted, the harder he nudged. At the door to the barn, he gave me a huge nudge causing me to fall out of the barn catching myself before I face planted in the dirt. I turned to see him going back to his stall, enter and turn and drag the stall door shut. I shook my head at his actions, but another beep and I turned and headed for the car. The driver was surprised I came from the barn, she was expecting me to come from the house. She was holding the door for me, so I entered as lady like as I could and soon we were off.

I was nervous, this is something I wanted so bad, but now that the time was near, I was not sure. This is all new to me, foreign in so many ways. The girls at the ranch were raised as female, enjoying what I desired, all their life. The last two days have been wonderful, able to participate with the girls as I had always dreamed of doing. Jenny the driver was talkative, and soon I had forgotten my fears. She asked if I rode horses, so I told her about Black Shadow and his antics. The time passed quickly, my fears misplaced somewhere along the way to the salon. As we got closer, I became more nervous. I stopped and thought of my horse, Black Shadow had been instrumental in forcing me to be the female of my dreams. I needed to do this for him, my lover and only friend. Well, my best friend.

She pulled right up in front of the salon, Stevie coming from inside to get my door. I was helped out and she took my hand leading me inside. She never released it, taking me right to one of the treatment rooms at the back of the salon. No chance to have cold feet and back out, I was soon out of my sweat suit and laying on the table completely naked.

A cream to remove my body hair, applied and let set for thirty minutes. After my front was done the back was next. As the cream was removed by a towel, I noticed how alive and receptive my skin was. Any touching or air movement caused goose pimples to sprout everywhere.

Some stirrups were removed from the end of the table and my feet were inserted in them. An ankle strap was added and then the stirrups were spread wide so Stevie could gain access to my groin. I was nervous, although I hated my male organ, always have, I was not sure that living as a female was even realistically possible. I know the makeup last night had me looking like a female, but looks and being a female is miles apart. Stevie talked to me as she worked, everything she was doing is temporary, allowing me to live as a woman for a while, to see if it is what I really wanted. I sighed, laid my head back and closed my eyes.

Something I had desired for years, yet now that the time is here, I am not so sure. When she was done, I had a perfect slit with two luscious lips surrounding it. Quite a change from before, much better looking in my opinion. I should be missing my male organ, but he and I never had much interaction. Unlike other boys, I found playing with my male thingy distasteful. It did react at times, but I was so embarrassed when it did make itself known.

I looked at the changes she had created, blushed again and far redder than before. I could no longer pass myself as male, the thing that sets males apart now missing. I am sure by the time she gets done, dressing as a male will be impossible. Sure enough, she moved her focus to my chest, two quite large cups glued to my chest right above my nipples. Hoses were hooked up to the cups and a pump started pulling any extra skin into the cups, the start of my breasts. The pump worked tirelessly at creating mountains where there was only a small nubbin before. Stevie was working on other parts of my body now, but my mind was still trying to process the fact that I would soon be well endowed. If the size of the forms are any indication, my soon to be breasts will certainly be noticed by one and all.

My ears got pierced, eyebrows thinned to a fine arch high on my forehead and then she turned her attention to my nails. Toenails first, the bright pink polish hard to ignore. Then my hands were next, the cuticles removed, a base coat applied that followed by three coats of color, each coat making the color even richer and deeper. The final application of a topcoat guaranteeing a bright shiny finish and protecting the color underneath.

For the next three hours as my breasts were developing, she worked on my hair. Split ends removed, then a dye job turning my brunette locks to an ash blonde. Way too many curlers were put in, I guess my days of straight locks are soon to be over with. A stint under the hair dryer, the breast machine moved right along with me still sucking my erstwhile breasts into greater prominence. It was all new to me, but oh so wonderful. For once the girl in me would show through, in fact I doubt anything would keep her from making her debut. I was excited, happy, joyful, and any other adjective you might be able to come up with. A lifelong dream now in my sights.

Then I thought of Black Shadow, will he still like me, hell will he even recognize me as my female self. Those thoughts were stopped cold as the breast machine was turned off and the hoses were removed. I looked down at the huge objects on my chest. From my view point they looked gigantic. The technician placed my hands on them, the cups still a little stiff, but I could feel the touch of my hands on the nipple, wonderful sensations spreading all over my body. I lightly squeezed them, the tsunami of feelings almost made me black out. Oh gawd, what am I going to do now?

My hair was removed from the curlers, and my new style was lightly brushed out. Some of my curls were left dangling from my neck, as the rest was helped into a high ponytail on the top of my head. The image in the mirror was all girl, lots of bouncing curls to entice any person looking to see the female and only the female possessing this body. I received some makeup plus some lessons in applying the basics and pronounced ready to get some clothes.

A portable rack was brought in, lots of delicious clothes picked out for my coloring and body type. I was happy to see not one single pair of pants, but then thought of how I was going to be able to ride Black Shadow. I tried on most of the clothes, not wanting to remove some of them, they were so pretty and made me look stunning. At the end of the rack was one lone pair of pants, with some words embroidered on the rear pockets. As I looked at the wording I blushed, in fancy pink script was the words Black Shadow is my lover. I took them off the rack and squeezed my body into the jeans. Believe me it was a squeeze, it took me three attempts to get the front zipper pulled up. I turned this way and that to make sure I looked feminine enough. There was no male left in my image, anything masculine was successfully erased by the salons efforts.

Jenny came into get me, the ride back to the ranch was long, dreading to be seen by those that knew me the most. What if they didn’t like my feminine appearance, would I be sent away, just when I was starting to fit in. For the last ten minutes of the trip I was holding my breath, then before passing out I had to take a big gulp of air. Finally we pulled up to the house at the ranch. There were cars around but no one to welcome me. Now I was getting worried, almost panicking. Jenny got my door and I stepped out. Before I could get my footing in the heels that I was wearing I heard a whinny and a horse racing towards me. I turned around and was face to face with Black Shadow.

I briefly wondered why he was left out, but then thought of his skill at opening his own stall. His head was right next to mine his neck laying on my shoulder. I tried to turn around to face him, but he would have none of that. We stood there for the longest time, as he rubbed his head next to me. I told him he was going to mess up my hairdo, but of course he was not listening. He finally broke off the encounter, stepped up in front of me pushing his head against my front. It took me a couple of minutes to figure out what he wanted.

I started walking that way towards his stable. As soon as we entered he walked to the tack room confirming my guess of what he wanted. I saddled him up and slipped the reins over his head. My jeans were so tight I had to use a step ladder to mount him, his head turned to make sure I was following through. He pushed open the stable door and headed for the trail. I did see Mom and Sis waving from the front porch of the house as Black Shadow headed down the trial. I had his reins in my hands but he was in charge of where we were going. He headed for the lookout at the top of the rim, just meandering along, no hurry, he was with his lover and time did not matter anymore.

When we got to the lookout he stopped and just stood there as we looked at the ever present thunderstorms developing in the valley below. I leaned down by his neck rubbing it back and forth as he tried to twist his neck to get me to rub the right spot. I finally found it, he was making noises, I am not sure what they were, but guessed he was pleased at my actions. After some time gazing at the scenery he turned and headed back down the trail. We entered the yard he went straight to the stables. He got the stable door again all by himself, then took me to the tack room. I slipped off the saddle and took it off, setting it back on the rack it came from, then his reins. I reached for his brushes and gave him a thorough brushing down. Again the noises of a contended horse. I was pushed down to his stall, then into his stall. He gave me some horse hugging then abruptly pushed me out of his stall. He closed his stall door then put his head over the half door. He leaned next to me, then gave me one of his sloppy kisses, I stomped my foot in protest, but he just pulled back and whinnied.

I was laughing as I made my way to the house, both Mom and Sis giving me huge hugs. Then they told me of Black Shadow walking the yard constantly until he saw the limo from the salon coming down the road. He ran around the yard in excitement, like he knew it was you and couldn’t wait to see you. That is why we stayed inside, sometimes lovers need a little private time to get the wet mushy romantic stuff out of the way. I told them of Black Shadow’s kiss in the stables, Mom chuckling and Sis’s Ewwwwww resonating around the kitchen.

After that discussion I was closely appraised, now that the important matters had been handled it was time to check out the new improved Brittany. I received many more hugs in the next hour, they felt so good. We had dinner but I was really not that hungry, my mind still on how I looked and being back with Black Shadow.

Lying in bed that night, I counted my blessings, my fondest dream a reality now, my life as a female now assured if that was what I wanted. Deep down I was sure, my heart feminine and with the love of my family I will be content with what life has given me. As I fell asleep I saw Black Shadow at my window keeping his eye on his lover. From the very start I was nudged in the right direction, thanks to my true love.

Story Complete For Now

© 2016 thru 2021 Fran Cesca Walker

  1. Two things.
    First – thank you for changing servers. This is so much more user friendly.
    Second – I think this is my favorite of yours so far – though favorites here is a crowded category. Though character development did not meet many obstacles once at the ranch, even so it was enjoyable and the interaction with animals was an interesting way to develop the character. Left me smiling.

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